long story short, i broke it off today and this weekend is probably one of the biggest of my life (lots of college stuff, i won a beauty pageant lol i know) and im going though this pain and i just really need some good christian advice ...
thanks in advanceSome christian advice is needed...?
Dear one, YOU have made a difficult BUT HONORABLE decision. YOU have chosen to NOT be abused. Congratualtions on choosing to honor the LIFE God created. YOUR life. NEVER let such treatment go on for SOOOO long.
Make sure in future relationships that YOU treat YOUR mate with respect and kindness too. FInd out WHO you are and what you wish to do with Gods gift of life BEFORE you get involved again. Pray to God and ask Him for direction in any plans He has for YOUR life.
BIG HUGE HUG!Some christian advice is needed...?
Replace the time you are used to spending with your bf and the time that you spent thinking about him and talking to him with God. When you start to miss talking to your bf talk to God about something completely different. One of the best gifts in times of pain is the comfort that God is there and also the gift of time. Time is the great healer of emotional pain and will give you comfort in the end. However, don't spend this time in vain. Use it to build and grow your relationship with the one who will never leave you, never forsake you, and will never disappoint you. He will always be there, faithful and true to His Word, which makes Him the perfect friend, and the perfect help in times of sorrow. Pray and seek the truth in His Word and He will comfort your heart in due time. I also suggest breaking off ties with your former bf. If you ever talk to him again just tell him to get his life straight and turn your back from him. God will lead you to a better man if it is in His Will, just be patient and consistent in your relationship with Him.
Not a Christian, but:
Get him out of your head! He doesnt deserve to be there if he treats you like that.. If he asks you why you dropped him, tell him the truth, because he sure deserves to hear it.
Also, spend time with friends and people who care for you, and it will be much easier for you to get over it. I'm sure they will lend you a shoulder to cry on if you need that, don't you think?
Good luck with all the college stuff!
Congrats for winning the pageant!
Ohhhh, and:
*Hugs*.
EDIT: We get thumbed down for giving good advice, only because we're atheists..?
I think that is incredibly hypocritical, to say the least!
First sorry you had to break up with you bf.
But it also sounds like he didn’t know when to stop drinking. Or letting the alcohol take control of him rather than him controlling the alcohol. There are some people while not alcoholics don’t realize just how much even a little effects their personality nor for how long after the drink.
I am sure you talked to him about the drinking issue, if he wasn’t willing to stop or at least sincerely try. There really is nothing you could do except break it off. It sounds cold but in such situations if you continue to hang around him, enabling him to continue the inappropriate behaviors, you are only hurting both of you in the long run. As the old saying goes sometimes it is better to slap a person’s hand than to hold it.
I know it hurts, your heart feels empty, you may even feel guilty at times, but in the long run you did the right thing.
Again I am sorry you had to do it, but sometimes we have to do difficult things in order to help others as well as ourselves.
May Our Creator watch over you and your family (and your ex-bf).
I can tell you from experience, he will not get better. If his personality changes when he drinks it is a good indication that he is addicted. He may not drink all the time but nonetheless he won't stop for anything. Be glad you are not married to him and have children. I had two drunken husbands. It is very painful, but if you stay active and with your friends that will help. But whatever you do, don't go back to him. He will not grow up once he starts drinking. He will continue with the same mentality until he quits drinking but then he will be very childish still. You must be a beautiful lady and I know there is someone much better for you. Just give it some time.
Think of other times that were hard in your life. Time passed and you feel differently now. You will get through this one too. Remember the power of prayer and reading God's word.
(James 5:16) . . .A righteous man’s supplication, when it is at work, has much force.
(Hebrews 4:12) . . .For the word of God is alive and exerts power and is sharper than any two-edged sword and pierces even to the dividing of soul and spirit, and of joints and [their] marrow, and [is] able to discern thoughts and intentions of [the] heart.
Not a Christian, you did the right thing,you don`t need an alcoholic boy friend ,that only leads to problems. You have lost him and that makes you feel bad but think of all the problems you are not going to have. Being beat ,abandon, betrayed, and possible death. You are the lucky one, eat some chocolate and be happy.
*hug*
it is ok you did the right thing
yah it is gunna take time to realize it
was for the better
but honeslty
let God take care of it
put it in HIS hands and leave it
there
dont think about it dont dwell on the
past
yah it will be tough
because you had some great memories
with him but that iis in the past and
there is someone that is WAY better than that
and you deserve better
dotn beat yourself up over how it use to be
Just have faith and be patient and if it is
ment to be and he really cares he'll
quit... trust me on that
Here are some words of encouragement.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. - Deuteronomy 31:6
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. – Matthew 11:28-30
';Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.';
Proverbs 3:5-6
So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
Stand your ground. His behavior is unacceptable. Continue to treat him decently, showing your true Christian spirit. But do not open the door for more ugly behavior.
It sounds like it is time to move on romantically. Enjoy this time in your life, sounds like you are on the right track.
looks like you already did the right thing by breaking it off.
all I can say is get on with your life and pray for him to see that he don't need to drink to have fun.
sounds like you have a lot of things going on in your life and you don't need his drama so just get on with it and good luck.
your doing great so far by getting away from him now just have faith in the Lord that he will be by your side through all of this and thank God for what you do have, heres a saying to live by,,,, dont ask God for the weight to be lifted off your shoulders,,,, ask for broader shoulders..
Good Luck
You did the right thing by ending it with this guy. Be strong and you will get through the pain.
PS As for Christian advice, remember this. God never closes one door without opening another. Look at this as his way of saying it is time to start anew.
*hug*.
I think you did the right thing. Remember, you can't fix him. He has some issues to sort out and until then keep away and protect your heart. I also broke up with my ex because of a serious drinking problem and although its a painful process, i am very glad that i did.
Be strong:)
It is better to have the support of friends how are close to you because you can draw on their love. Other than that, give it to God, He is faithful.
Turn your life over to CHRIST.Get your bible and read it daily.Live your life as GOD would have you live it.He loves you,and he will help you.Do not conform to this world.GOD-bless
I think you need to be selfish and take care of you. So if that means locking yourself in your room and reading the word or going home. You do it.
This should be in the dating section not R%26amp;S. You've done the smart thing by dumping him. All you have left to do is to move on.
Think positive. You got rid of someone nasty in your life. Now find yourself someone nice.
Oh and I hope you don't mind that it's atheist advice.
Pray. God will answer.
You need him out of your life. He's living in your head and not paying rent. *hug*
*hug*
Be strong, drop him, move on!
You're bound to feel a great loss in your life after being with him for a year. Were you living together? If so the love you believe you have means grief for a while. It should gradually eaes with time as you learn to cope.
The main thing is to focus on living your life now and moving on, trying your best to resist the urge of thinking too much of what causes you to feel hurt. Attempt to have a balanced view of your boyfriend and not to doubt the decision you've made. Becareful if he tries to claim you back, perhaps even making excuses he will commit suicide if you don't return.
Keep busy , read and meditate on the bible. Build up your reliance on god through prayer, asking for his spirit, and to help you keep firm in the faith. Remember, the bible says that god is 'near to those crushed in spirit'. He will deliver you if you search for him, as did David before he became King.
Thank God you are still young and there are still a lot of fish in the sea!
Obviously you've shown that you don't need a man to succeed! Good for you!
Your ex-boyfriend sounds like he's going through one of those typical selfish immature male stages. It happens. They go out and party, start drinking, and just act like all-around jerks. He'll grow out of it eventually (I hope), but if I were you I wouldn't wait around for that to happen.
Pray for strength and wisdom, and remember that you are loved even when some man treats you like ';meat.'; Respect yourself and treat yourself with the utmost care, including your heart, mind, and body.
****
EDIT: Well, Ray, I suppose it always helps to see both sides of the story...I wouldn't touch your mess with a 10-foot pole.
Take the ';story'; to the tabloid magazines.......or ';agony aunt';,probably get the advice you are wishing for. Good luck !
You could try to work things out with him, and try to control his drinking. But if worse comes to worse, break it up.
God bless.
What do you need advice about?
you need to see me. come in my teepee. i make you happy!
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